When children set and achieve personal goals it can affect the way they view themselves, and it is an important skill to learn both now and for the future. The new school year is a great time to start. But for many kids, goal setting doesn’t just happen. More often than not, it’s an acquired skill that requires the guidance, support, and encouragement of a parent.. Once children learn to set and work toward goals, they can turn today’s dreams into tomorrow’s reality. This information is adapted from an article by Denise Yearian, a writer who specializes in family topics.
Following are some tips to help:
1. Start early, start simple. Don’t over-reach. Provide structure for goal-setting by having your child aim for something achievable. Good goals might be saving for a special toy, reading a certain number of books, improving a sports skill such as free throws in basketball, or learning to ride bike.
2. Let your child direct. For the goal to be meaningful, it has to be something that is important to your child. Parents may give input, but the goal needs to be the child’s idea for him or her to truly embrace it.
3. Write it down. Make sure the goal is clear and sensible. Have your child include why it is important to him or her. Hang it on the bedroom wall, refrigerator or the bathroom mirror as a reminder. Get a folder or binder to chart progress; let your child decorate the front.
4. Get specific. Outline steps to attaining the goal. Help your child break the goal down into smaller steps or goals so he or she will feel a sense of accomplishment along the way.
5. Consider potential obstacles. Help your child anticipate hurdles and think in advance of ways to overcome them. If children know there will be road bumps along the way, it can ward off discouragement. Remind your child that obstacles are opportunities to learn and strengthen resolve.
6. Decide on a deadline. Set a time frame for attaining the goal. Have your child write down an approximate time frame for achieving the goal to provide a sense of urgency and keep him on track.
7. Monitor and chart progress. Have your child chart progress tangibly – with pictures, charts, or some other kind of record. Include symbols of your child’s
success such as certificates, medals, report cards, etc. The message you want to convey is that the journey is as important as the destination.
8. Make adjustments. Change the time frame, or even the goal, if necessary. Remind your child that there may be unforeseen circumstances that have kept him from attaining his goal in the allotted time. Encourage him to re-evaluate and continue on.
9. Be a cheerleader. Provide support and encouragement rather than criticism. Help your child brainstorm solutions if difficulties arise, but allow him or her to set the direction (even if you think it is wrong). Look for other ways to support your child without taking charge of the goal.
10. Be a mentor. Talk about your own personal goals – and the trials you faced in trying to achieve them. Demonstrate perseverance and discipline, and continue to set personal goals for yourself.
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Tom Bartley is a retired educator and currently works at the Family Support Council, 1529 WaringRd., Dalton, GA 30721; fax # 706-275-6542; or bartley10@windstream.net. For a copy of this article and more information about The Family Support Council, visit www.familysupportcouncil.com.